When I was in college, I imagined traveling for work to be glamorous. I envisioned well dressed pretty people jet setting around, solving the country's profound systematic problems. I'd have a super high tech lap top and a wardrobe that would've made Elle Woods squeal. I'd glide through the terminal corridors, with my luggage practically floating behind me. Hotels would have chocolates on the pillow, and meals would be spiced up with stories that tickle the funny bones of other seasoned work travelers.
Reality is not quite living up to that.
As a woman, you've got to squeeze in the extra pair of shoes.
I've been stuck in the Greater Rochester Airport for 3 hours. There is no way for me to get comfortable on these airport benches. No matter how much I twist, turn, and contort, it's going to be impossible for me to try to sneak in some much needed sleep. Not that the plane is much better. Unfortunately, first class is out of our corporate budgets for a while.
I'm tired of going through the security checks at the airports... with the smallest airports exercising the most thorough screening. The inflated sense of duty is mixed with the local speed quotient resulting in a super slow work rate. Yes, that's my driver's license, and my boarding pass, and I look like the picture in the license, and the name on the license matches the boarding pass. All good? Molasses Mo just wasted 20 minutes of my time because he doesn't know how to speed up the process. This is the only time I'd like invoke racial profiling, easy for a young asian chic to say.
Then it's the ridiculous ordeal of taking off the shoes, jacket, laptop, toiletries, etc. Seriously? Shoe bombs? That's sooooo 2001! Like I'm really going to be able to get any combustion going with my flip flops. And I can't bring liquids through? That squarely benefits the vendors selling Poland Spring for a three thousand percent markup. I go to Costco- I know how much that shit costs.
Charging for carry ons? Yeah, that means people have overstuffed bags plus a few extra personal items that they try to squeeze into the overhead. Carry-on, Laptop bag, book bag, purse, shopping bag, straw hat... ? Come on! Where the heck do you really think you'll fit your crap? (Parents traveling with small children are excluded... those folks need all the tricks they can fit in their bag to keep their kids quiet)
As I write this, the bar is closing down- only food available for purchase in this whole place is reduced to a few bags of chips, two salads, and a sandwich. I'm far from being a food snob, but I do have some standards for sustenance. I'm better off letting this beer mingle undisturbed in my empty stomach than have it mingle with some wilty salad and grossly ill refrigerated sandwich.
It's somewhat sad that my return to the blogosphere is inspired by the rants of airline travel. Maybe it's the subversive way to discourage air travel in efforts to reduce everyone's carbon footprint. Eh, if only the evil system were so progressive.
Oh man, the bartender hands me my bill, and all I hear is the sound of everyone's corporate card slapped down on the counter with a tinge of defeat. Those surrounding the bar are all equally annoyed to still be here. Probably more annoyed that the bar is closing down.
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